All in It's My Life

2004 is over.  I really enjoyed myself this past year and accomplished a lot...  maybe more than I've ever done now that I think of it.  I went to California twice, Florida twice, to Chicago, DC, and to Boston--the most flying I've ever done in a single year.  I kayaked and helped others to take advantage of the Manhattan waterfront.  I put 10,000 miles on my car.  I started a website for college students, and saw a mentoring program through.  I helped put together the ILPA conference in New York.  I played on a kickball team and coached a corporate softball team to a winning record.  I started blogging this year.  I was in the newspaper not once, not twice, but three times.

I met some great new people, especially at the boathouse...  Kati, Sandy, Taino, Victor, Graeme, Gretha, Claire, etc...  rediscovered some old friendships, like Pastore, Kristin, Liz, and Susie, and said goodbye to a long friendship that didn't work.  I met lots of great people through work, like Fred and Brad at Union Square, Roger at Elevation Partners (and Bono, of course!), and Gina from the State of Virginia.
So how am I going to follow 2004 up?  I won't make resolutions, but I'll through out some goals.  I'd like to open myself up to a relationship, and while that's hardly a plannable goal, I think perhaps I've had opportunities in the past to create something and I wasn't ready for it.  Stanford remains a goal, whether I get in this year or submit another application in October.  A book is a goal--hopefully I have the right topic now and I'd also like to contibute as much as I can to helping people understand this new content medium.  I've been thinking that perhaps a return to church might be a goal... which I was never averse to, but I never set aside the time to be a part of a parish commuity, so it didn't interest me without that aspect.  And, finally, I'd like to start an alumni association for Fordham's College of Business Administration, which it is lacking at the moment.  Oh yeah.. and I want to buy an apartment this year, too.  That should be enough to keep me occupied.



This morning, my local R train arrived at 59th Street in Brooklyn just as an N train sat waiting on the express side. As the R train slowed to open its doors, the N train started up and took off, much to the shagrin of all of the R train passengers who wanted to transfer to the express. The N was not full and this is the second time this has happened to me in a week. I've been riding the subway almost everyday since I was 14 and if I had a dollar for everytime this happened to me, across multiple lines, I wouldn't be concerned about another fare hike.

Customers on the R train into Bay Ridge suffer some of the worst service the system has to offer because of the infrequency of service after rush hour. I've spent significant time waiting on that same 59th St. platform waiting for a local R to take me home after 8PM. Given that, the MTA should be doing everything it can to minimize wait times and passenger frustration on that line. I don't expect extra trains, but if a connecting express train is already in the station, it should never leave while a local is just seconds away from closing its doors.

This also leads to passenger frustration and stress, which I'm sure is positively correlated with incidence of violence, accidents, mistreatment of MTA employees. This makes what probably amounts to a 30 second tradeoff seem very worth it for all involved.

I'm asking that an express or connecting train never leave a station while another train is entering the other side with passengers waiting to connect.

Thank you for your consideration.

Charles E. O'Donnell
MTA Passenger, NYC + NYS Taxpayer

My college notebooks are pretty consistant...  pages and pages of a lesson title across the top of the page, and then... nothing.  All blank.  Page after page.  No notes.

In fact, I rarely ever take notes.  If I'm on an informational phonecall doing research, that's one thing, but for most meetings, don't expect to see a pen and paper in my hand.  It's just not the most effective way for me to retain knowledge.

Does that mean I don't care what you have to say?  Hardly!  It means I'm really listening intently, and completely focused on not just recording what you're talking about, but actually trying to understand it... seeing the forest, not just counting trees.  I'm trying to build a system of understanding in my head that not only helps me put the facts you're giving me into context, but will help me filter and interpret new facts that will be sure to come down the pipeline going forward--all based on what I'm learning from you.

And that's the most important thing for me.  We suffer from information overload.  I don't need more information... I need context and filters.  I need you to help me build a method and system for understanding what I need to understand... not more lists.  Because if I record your list, I'm sure to get another list from someone else, and see a list online, and before I know it, I have a list of everything--a universal set.  That won't do be any good.

I used to laugh when teachers would put up new math problems in class and call on someone in class to answer.  Those students would immediately go flipping through their notes.  Sorry, this isn't a problem you've seen before.  This is something entirely new that you're expected to answer given what you've LEARNED. 

You're not synthesizing!    You don't have this particular problem in your notes.  You're expected to actually think about it, and for many people, that doesn't happen through notetaking, but they're all taught to do that.  Take notes.  That's the way we all learn, right?

A lot of times, if I've been talking to someone and they're taking notes, I stop them.  The kinds of things you often take notes about can be looked up, while actual understanding isn't easily recalled.  This is especially the case in a hyperconnected, hyperpublished world, where all my brain needs to remember is that you mentioned a "search guy at New York Times" and it will take me two seconds to look up his information on LinkedIn and remember the name. 

If you didn't see the forest the first time, you're hardly going to be able to piece together the whole thing from the three trees you took notes on... and that's usually what notes wind up being:  A piecemeal, incomplete account of information completely without context.  Often times, this information often becomes self reinforcing and you can get led down a wrong path from it.  For example, if you're an entrepreneur and we're having a conversation about fundraising, I might rattle off a few of the kinds of angels I know that might invest in your company given what little I know about it, but maybe I don't really know enough.  You write these names down and then follow up by asking me for introductions to these people.  My assumption is that you've done your homework and figured out whether these folks are a good fit for your business.  Your assumption, however, was that I fully understood the nature of your business and suggested the best three angels for you. 

On the other hand, if there was some consistency in why I was naming particular angels, and you understood enough of that to ask a question like, "Are you naming those guys because they're all in NYC or they're all likely to do deals in the music space, because I don't plan on keeping the company here" then we can narrow down exactly who might be a good fit.  If you're just sitting there recording everything I say, you might miss that. 

Of course, everyone learns and listens differently.  Alex is a notetaker.  He's got a nice leatherbound book where he furiously records notes, thoughts, lists, etc.  That works for him.  Brad works the same way and he's extremely organized about it.  I often wondered if it was about creating a physical reference to go back to or helping to commit important facts to memory--or whether it was something completely different...  some kind of internal blog of thoughts born from the meeting itself.   Fred, however, I've never seen take a pad to a meeting.  He learns by interacting, by poking holes, poking bears...  He's a tinkerer.  He'll never remember the three companies you said you were in contract with, but he'll think more about why those companies are a good fit for you.  The next time you talk to him, he'll name you six companies you should try to do deals with--the three companies you already gave him and the three that are next highest on your list that you never ever mentioned.  

Also, when I meet someone for the first time, to me, it's about relationship building, not one way downloading. People aren't information stores to be downloaded.  In my mind, and for the way I work, they're applications to be interacted with.  I'd rather build a relationship with you where I understand your interests, your market, your ideas--what you bring to the table-- nd you learn the same about me, see how passionate I am, etc...  just two people talking shop and getting to know each other.  It's all about leaving markers for me.  I'll mark in my head what kinds of information I can rely on you for later, but not necessarily the details of what information that was, because I want to make it a great conversation so that we want to chat again. 

To be honest, if this is a one shot deal and I have to quickly get from you what I can because you don't have the interest in continuing this, I'm really not interested.  There are so many people out there with great experience that I believe you can get a lot further by focusing on the ones that like you, believe in you, and share your vision. 

At the end of the day, we all have different styles and different methods of dealing with information that work for us.  It's a bad move to interpret someone else's style in the context of your own and make assumptions about what it means.  I don't have a notepad.  I'm not good with notes.  I find them distracting, they never really get processed and organized--they're not going to do either of us any good, so trust me, you don't want me taking them.  I'll do the extra research immediately after a meeting to recreate a good portion of the lists you mentioned by connecting, tagging, discovering, etc. in exchange for being able to see the bigger picture behind what you were talking about.  If you can do both, great.

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Boston got 7 inches of snow this morning, but it was light and fluffy when it first fell.  I was able to clean my car out pretty quickly with just a broom.  I had a little help from a Harvard facilities plow as well.

Supposedly, its going to turn to rain, so I should be able to get home ok tonight.




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What is Your World View? created with QuizFarm.com
You scored as Cultural Creative

Cultural Creatives are probably the newest group to enter this realm. You are a modern thinker who tends to shy away from organized religion but still feels as if there is something greater than ourselves. You are very spiritual, even if you are not religious. Life has a meaning outside of the rational.

Cultural Creative

88%

Existentialist

63%

Postmodernist

63%

Modernist

56%

Idealist

56%

Materialist

50%

Romanticist

31%

Fundamentalist

25%

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I'm just going to update last year's Thanksgiving post, because, thankfully, a lot of the same things I was grateful for last year are still around, but I do have some notable new additions, of course.

In my family, Thanksgiving is pretty much about eating...    but we're Italian, so that's to be expected.  Still, it's nice to actually stop stuffing your face for a second and think about what you're thankful for.   Here's my list.   If you blog a list of what you're thankful for, tag it "thanksgivinglist" on del.icio.us...    I'd love to see what everyone else appreciates...  and when you write the list, don't forget to tell others to tag it as well.

  1. Most importantly, I'm thankful for my family...  My parents, my grandmothers (both 90 in February), and my brothers and nieces.  It hasn't been an easy year for everyone, but we're all still here and getting by.
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  3. I'm thankful that Shri introduced me to Mere (@ptrain)--the needle in the proverbial haystack.  I wish she was closer, but what can ya' do?  I look forward to her entry into the blog world come winter break and her entry into my world at some undetermined point in the future.  :)
  4. I'm thankful to be working on Path 101-- a project I am incredibly passionate about.  I had no idea this was what I'd be doing a year ago, which shows you how unpredictable life can be, but I'm very fortunate to have the support of enough people who believe in me to help me and Alex get this off the ground.  I'm also very thankful for having convinced found Alex and convinced him to join in the first place--we make a great team.
  5. I'm thankful for great friends--some really special people in my life.  My schedule is always crazy, but a handful of people have managed to hold on for the ride...   some are new and some are old, and some are old friends that have become new in a way... coming back from college or grad school to continue and strengthen friendships from the past...     To Brian, Suzie, Allison, Deirdre, Pastore, Ryan, Tommy, MaryAnn... thanks for sticking around.  I'm also thankful for my friend Amy and her new little girl.

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  7. I'm thankful for my health...  no major softball, kayaking, dodgeball, football, biking, skiing, or driving injuries quite yet...    *knocks on wood*.  Speaking of which, I'm thankful for my various dodgeball and softball teams...  Dodge This! is moving on to its seventh or eight season, I lost count, and although we had a Mets-like slide this year, Four of Us Had Lyme Disease is still together after five seasons of its own.
  8. I'm thankful for the Downtown Boathouse... not just the buildings
    or the activities, but for the community.  It's my second home five
    months out of the year and I've made some terriffic friends through
    it.  More importantly, it's given me a new appreciation for the
    conservation of nature in this city and a new perspective on New York.

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  10. I'm thankful for this city...   the only place I've ever really wanted to live and ever have.  There's no place like it anywhere else, and I couldn't ask for anything more than to always be able to put a roof over my head here and to be happy with my life here.

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  12. I'm thankful for the success of nextNY....  or rather...  I'm thankful that it's success has enabled me to meet so many fantastic people that I can relate to and who have a vested interested in developing the NYC technology community.  That's really what has been the most fun for me...    the people are great and my new geek friends are too many to name.
  13. And lastly...  I'm thankful for this blog.  Seriously.  Blogging has led me to three jobs (because I'm pretty sure I'd still be looking for a tech partner if I wasn't a blogger), two relationships (directly or indirectly), an adjunct gig, countless connections with really interesting people, on time furniture delivery and an elementary school reunion.  It's been a great sounding board for my ideas and a lightning rod for people with similar interests.  Thanks for reading... thanks for commenting, thanks for sharing on your own blogs and linking over...    Your attention is much appreciated.

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TheDay.com - On I-95, A Deadly Day

Yesterday, I spent the afternoon answering e-mails, managing the sending of documents around back and forth to our lawyer about our financing, and speaking with some folks from a university career office.

I did this all from my car, on my phone, parked, engine off, in the middle of I-95, miles behind an accident that blocked traffic in all directions and stuffed up a good portion of the roads in Connecticut.  It was one of the most utterly ridiculous driving experiences of my life.  Wherever you went, there were cars, cars, and more cars, and backwoods Connecticut roads that couldn't handle the backup.  Eventually, I made my way up Rt. 85 up to I-84 and over to Boston, but stop and go most of the way.  I'm finally glad that's over.

Still, I fared better than the folks involved in this terrible accident.

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