All in Friends and Outings

So the foreign girl at the counter at DTUT has a boyfriend...   some greasy looking guy... sort of takes something out of our little exchanges when I get my green tea.  Oh well.

So I've had a really great Memorial Day Weekend so far.  Friday night was a long overdue cleaning of my apartment.  I threw out five big garbage bags of...  just random crap.  I seriously have issues about holding on to stuff.  When I moved out of Fordham, my desk alone produced about three for four garbage bags of stuff, which is difficult to comprehend given the mass of the desk and the known and accepted laws of phyisics.

On Saturday, I was back at the Boathouse.  The water was choppy and the wind was whipping up pretty good, but a handful of brave souls still came to kayak.  One girl took a nice flop into the water by the dock, and I pulled her out by her lifejacket like I was one of those shipping cargo cranes... up, over, and down.  Mary came down...  I don't think I mentioned Mary and Andy.   Mary is this english woman who came down last weekend for the first time.  We started talking and it turns out she works for a publishing company.  She's going to take a look at my book and everything... how do you like that for dumb luck.  Kayaking:  fun AND productive.  Anyway... she gave me her e-mail address and number.  Then, later on, another woman comes down and tells me her friend just called her and told her how much fun she had, so she had to go.  It turns out that it was Mary, and so this girl Andy and I started chatting it up.  She was incredibly cool, and after she kayaked, she actually hung out to volunteer almost the whole day.  I think she's be a lot of fun to hang out with, but I'll wait until Mary looks at my book before I make any move that might be perceived as sketchy.  You never know and can't be too careful.

Anyway, from kayaking, I went to the Big East Baseball Finals in Bridgewater, NJ.  Brian and Rich met me at the entrance to the Holland Tunnel, and I drove out to Jersey.  They had the game in an Atlantic League ballpark, which is one of those Independent minor league teams.  I'll tell you.. it was such an enjoyable experience--$8 tickets, $2 for parking.  I'd easily go back again.  Brian's brother Jimmy was there with his wife.  I swear, Jimmy makes me laugh more than any other person I've ever met.  Something about the dryness and deadpan delivery I just find endlessly amusing.  His wife asks him where the bathrooms are... and its a dinky little stadium where everything is like two feet away, and he goes, "Its on the Concourse Level."   Hysterical.

Anyway, after the game, I hung out with Anna...   everyone else pretty much left for the weekend, so Anna and I were left to chill Saturday night and Sunday.  Saturday night we... painted.  It was bizzare.   She doesn't have any brushes or canvas, so she just paints on cardboard.  She can be so weird sometimes, but I guess it was cool.  We had nice conversation and it was just good company.  I left and came back the next morning for a random roadtrip.  We just decided we were going to go on a driving adventure, and somehow, that turned out to be a search for my grandmother's old country house in Greenwood Lake.  I drove up 17, and somehow I found it.  It was really strange being up there, because everything seemed so much smaller than I remember it--meaning I was obviously pretty small the last time I was up there.  Two different people had occupied the house since we sold it about ten years ago, but it was kept up very well.  When I got up there, I called my grandmother to tell her were I was and she got a little choked up.  Still, she was really glad to hear that the house had been kept in such good condition.

What was really disappointing, though, was when we walked down to the beach on the lake.  There was this little pier that they built about 20 years ago when I was younger and they put in sand behind it.  It was small but cute.  As we walked down the stairs to get there, it was obvious that they hadn't been kept up, but I wasn't prepared for how bad the beach was.  It was in total disrepair, like it hadn't been touched in that long.  The deck and pier is collapsing into the water, and all the sand is gone, with weeds overgrowing the concrete.  It was really sad to see...   makes me wonder what happened.  The raft we used to swim out to was gone, and it looked like part of it was sunken on the far side of the deck.  Anna took some pictures, but I don't think I'll be showing them to my grandmother.  I'm curious to figure out what happened and when.

Anyway, before we hit the house, we stopped at a marina.  Turns out that a pontoon boat rental is only like $150 for three hours...   The whole time we were there, we were thinking that it would be cool to come up here for a few days with a group of people, and it wouldn't cost that much money. 

After the Lake, we headed out towards Warwick, but on our way, we passed Wawayanda, which is this state park that has a beach.  I went with my grandparents a few times and I have pretty vivid memories of it.  We ate lunch at the beach and then we rented a rowboat.  I don't know if she just timed the current wrong or what, but Anna had quite a struggle with the rowing.  :)   

From Wawayanda, we went to a Farmer's Market in Warwick.  They had good icecream, and we stopped to watch the farm animals they had in their corral.  They had a goat and some sheep, and some baby goats as well.  I think that might have been the highlight of our trip.  Anna's got some good pictures, but I don't know how to post them.  If I figure it out, I'll put them up. 

Anyway, after we headed home at about 3...  but made a stop off at the Cross County Mall.  I went 4 for 4 on things I had to buy...  swim shorts, nice sandles, work shoes, and those wet sock things that you wear in the water. When I got home, I went for a run and to the gym... putzed around...   and now, I'm at DTUT, procrastinating on writing up some more material for my Tuesday lunch with Mary the publishing woman.

Its one thing to find yourself in a place where you don't really know anyone.  Its another to find yourself in a place where you difinitively dislike a good number of the people around you. 

When I walked out the door tonight, I felt good...  Tony Robbins good.  It was close to 40, and this winter, that's borderline shorts weather.  Things got very cold the moment I walked into the bar party I went to tonight--when my high school girlfriend takes one look at me and turns her back to me to talk to someone else, as I say hello the girl she was just talking to.  Just say hello and smile...   is that too hard to ask for two years of my life?  I never did anything to her to warrent that kind of treatment, and while she may be uncomfortable around me, I can't imagine its more uncomfortable than purposely avoiding someone.  I mean, seriously... how old are we?  Get over it.  I thought maybe I could buy her a drink, to bury the hatchet once and for all.  How silly do I feel now to think that was even a remote possibility.

It turned out to be foreshadowing for the whole night.  This is a group that acknowledges your presence only out of necessity.  I felt like going around to all of these people and reminding them of whatever connected me to them in the first place, and reiterating what should be the normal rules of human being operating behavior.

"Hey, by the way...  do you remember bumping into me in the park when we were both running?  I seem to recall discovering that we worked only a few blocks from each other and exchanging e-mail addresses.  I e-mailed you and asked you if you wanted to do lunch... you never responded.  Would it have killed you to go to lunch?"

"And you...  weren't we in the business student mentoring program together that summer...  the three representatives from our school?  I also seem to remember making dinner for you once to catch up.  Now, you don't even make eye contact."

"And you... you live on my damn street!  YOU came up to ME in the laundrymat once... we talked.  Then, one day you decided that saying hello when you saw me coming back from the gym in the morning was too much effort.  WTF is that?"

"And you...  You're not really in this group, and I don't mind you being here anyway, b/c you're pretty hot and its cool to see you with another chick, but I bought you a slice of pizza in Pugsley's the first time I ever met you and to this day, I feel like I have to reintroduce myself to you everytime I see you.  I think I want that buck fifty back."

Sometimes I wonder if its me and my perspective... that if there's something systematic about the way I've encountered them that makes them seem superficial.  Are they superficial to each other?  Countrast that with Sue Yoo's friends, who are wonderful everytime I meet them.  It doesn't matter if they're new people or not, but they're just so willing to share their good time with the people around them... its a pleasurable experience.  Tonight was far from pleasurable. 

Deirg and I almost got into another argument... this time about some kid cutting into our conversation, and her just leaving me out to dry and letting it happen.  She didn't want to start an argument between us and just left well enough alone...  and this point is sort of at the core of why we fight...  I've never met anyone who handles things so differently than I do.  I can't sit by and let anything go idling by... maybe to my own detriment.  Who knows?  Point is... there are times I'd like to be stood up for that I don't feel like I get from her. There many amzing things she's done for me everyday that we've been friends... but active verbal support... I dunno.. maybe I have outsized expectations.   Still, she's my best friend and I'll always love her.

I don't think there were any lessons learned here...  tonight just sucked.

PS...   Big ups to Linds...    the girl who never gets dressed up looked like a fox tonight.  wooooooo   ;)